Just for laughs

Nice one-liners ..often gets re-forwarded ..but a nice laugh:

• When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane
• Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first
• If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants
• It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere
• The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
• The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it
• If you tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe, he'll believe you. But if you tell him a park bench has just been painted, he has to touch it to be sure
• If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?
• Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers
• Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups
• The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker
• I say no to drugs they just don't listen